Calm

So I am calm now.

It's funny how in a fit of rage you turn to a schizophrenic (not saying I did..or did I).
In a fit of rage, you may turn to something you are not. or show that side of you that is hardly ever out.

You sit down and think. Why was I actually upset? You always find out why, sometimes you are angry at things that are not worth it and sometimes the 'situation' deserves more than you just being angry, it deserves your wrath.

I sat and thought, I laughed and thought, I ate and thought and thought and thought and thought. And I realized, I was really harsh. I acted out of it. I should not have. I can understand my mate's position, I really can, even though I couldn't then, even though there are parts to the explanations I do not agree with and I do not believe.

But is it all worth it? Loosing a friend over? Does that friend deserve it? It really is not that friend's fault.

Sometimes being created a girl is not easy, all these emotions and hormones springing up, making you act like other girls you would have scolded. Making you have that brief moment of 'madness'

Well, I now wish I hadn't said, or done, the things I said. I'll have to apologize.

I want to apologize.